DOD

dodDoD brings you the most hilarious and ridiculous invention ever: a hand-held lie detector. red’ means you’re lying …How do you ask a suicide bomber after he blew up the square???

Is DoD the new RED in the war-against-HIV/Aids RED campaign?

DoD as in Do or Die! Oops, Department of Defense formerly known as Department of WAR (no kidding!!!) has done it again: using up taxpayers money to create more nonsense: a handheld lie detector…

New anti-terror weapon: Hand-held lie detector

U.S. troops in Afghanistan first to get new device; red’ means you’re lying

The Defense Department says the portable device isn’t perfect, but is accurate enough to save American lives by screening local police officers, interpreters and allied forces for access to U.S. military bases, and by helping narrow the list of suspects after a roadside bombing. The device has already been tried in Iraq and is expected to be deployed there as well. “We’re not promising perfection — we’ve been very careful in that,” said Donald Krapohl, special assistant to the director at the Defense Academy for Credibility
Assessment, the midwife for the new device.

Some of the short comings of the device:

  • both the proponents and critics agree on one thing: This new device is likely to be less accurate than a polygraph, because it gathers less physiological information.
  • oops: gathering less physiological information in a war zone where everybody is ‘de facto’ stressed out… that’s going to be as accurate as measuring the distance between the earth and the moon with your thumb…
  • So a US solder will ask an Afghan : "did you put this bomb here"? (just after an explosion… which triggers lots of emotions anyway…) and the Afghan most likely needs a translator…
  • so how do you narrow the list of suicide bomber suspects after a roadside???

Really DoD: WHO YOU GONNA ASK?

who you gonna ask

Oh well: if we can go to war in Iraq and spend billions with no results, then why not create a device with equally no results… lead by example!

How long can you laugh before you cry?

Now which one of these you want to interrogate…

Can we use the new DoD device on politicians?

Really: can all politicians use the device when they are giving their next speech? Just for the fun of it :-) red’ for embarrassing

colin Powell

I mean really Colin Powell: is that anthrax you are carrying?

  • if yes: if it breaks, wouldn’t that wipe out the United Nations Security Council? red’ for embarrassing
  • if no: then who are you trying to fool? red’ for embarrassing

Or was it yet another publicity stunt (gone real bad after 4000 US dead soldiers…) like selling fast cars as if they went as fast as the operation needed for adding the boobs to the model (not the car model, the babe model sitting on it).

fast boobs

red’ for hot

The RED Campaign DOD for embarrassing

Back in January 2006 U2’s Bono launched RED : a new global brand or associated product code.

gisele bundchen having sex

Gisele Bundchen having sex with … oops
Gisele Bundchen and a Masai warrior
in lots of RED because
red lips, red cars, red clothes…
red makes money!
Yes: the new DoD lie detectors makes lots of money for yet another useless device

The aim of the Real RED Campaign is that :

a share of profits from ‘Red’ branded products
(American Express, Gap, Converse, Motorola, Giorgio Armani…
selling T-shirts, footwear, sunglasses, handphones credit card
in red or a RED logo)
will be used
to fight against Aids in Africa
.

RED for a real cause…

But in the case of the handheld lie detector: just another red wasted… Trying to fund yourself DOD … :-(

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